New Beginnings

I can't believe it's been 3 years since I've written anything on here!  And I really can't believe it's been 6 years since I started this little blog.  I'm pretty sure at this point, it's just me, myself, and I actually reading this, but I've been challenged to try writing again, so I'll see how it goes.

I just spent a long time skimming through all my previous posts.  In some ways it's encouraging to see how life has changed - new jobs, new friends, new homes, and so on, and in other ways it's depressing to think I'm still asking a lot of the same questions and struggling with the same things.  (Not to mention it makes me realize what a bad memory I have...I do not even remember applying to grad school!  ha!)  I guess that's why it's good to write and reflect....

Putting words on paper or on the screen is scary to me.  It seems so permanent and exposed.  I even have a fear of writing things in my own personal journal because someone, someday could find it and read it.  Not that I have deep, dark secrets...it just scares me for some reason.  I'm afraid of being wrong (and leaving written proof!) or of sounding dumb or pathetic or maybe of looking back 6 years later and realizing life isn't what I expected it to be and that I still don't have my questions answered.

I do know through it all that God is in control and he knows the big picture even if I don't.  I will continue to trust in Him and dream about 3 years or 6 years from now when I'll look back at this post and think life is not what I expected it to be...it's so much better than what I could have imagined!

It's a new year.  I don't know what's ahead, but I want to take risks and live this year well.  I want to live this year with purpose.  With joy.  With anticipation.  With HOPE.

And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. ~Romans 5:5