Sometimes I wonder where my future is headed. I question why God brought me to this place in time, and why certain things happened the way they did. Leading up to and during college, it felt like my path was pretty clear, like God was directing me and giving me purpose. I think some of that is a natural result of the necessity of making decisions about where to go to school, what to major in, etc. Everything I was doing was in pursuit of a specific career (little did I know it was a career I wouldn't end up wanting).
Since graduating, the path hasn't been quite so defined. I can't really complain -- I love my job, my church, my friends, and I'm pretty happy with my life as it is -- but sometimes I wonder what else I could or should be doing and whether God is really guiding me in a specific direction.
The other day, I read this in My Utmost for His Highest, "Abraham went through thirteen years of silence, but in those years all self-sufficiency was destroyed; there was no possibility left of relying on common-sense ways. Those years of silence were a time of discipline, not of displeasure."
When I think of Abraham, I think of someone who was very close to God. He clearly heard from God and followed his leading. He fully trust in God, to the point of leaving behind everything he knew to go to an unknown place with an unknown future. I think of him being in constant communion with God...but thirteen years of silence? That's a long time! And yet Abraham still believed.
I love that last sentence because I'm sure it was easy for Abraham to think God was not happy with him if he was silent for so long, but He had a purpose in the silence.
It's easy for me to think that God is displeased with where I'm at when the days feel quiet. Did He get tired of me not listening? Am I too complacent? Did He give up on me? Did He move on to someone else?
Or maybe I'm asking the wrong questions.
Maybe He's teaching me something in the silence.
Maybe He's working on something I can't yet see.
I need to learn to wait. And to listen.
Sunday, January 25, 2015
Saturday, January 24, 2015
I wish...
- I could travel more
- More of my friends lived closer
- Coffee & chocolate could be as nutritious as veggies
- Teeth didn't get cavities
- I could dance
- College classes weren't so expensive
- I could go skydiving again
- I had a personal hair stylist
- Legs didn't have hair
- Gas prices would stay under $2/gallon
- Weekends were 3 days long
- Summer camp could be real life
- I was sleeping right now
Friday, January 23, 2015
TGIF
Happy Friday! This week was long and fast at the same time.
Highlights:
1. Dinner with my roommates - so grateful for them! Thai food so spicy it burned my throat...but so yummy!
2. Small group with just the girls - and the babies. Love getting to cuddle those little ones.
3. Coffee shop hopping after an afternoon dentist appointment. Had to leave the first place after my internet time ran out. Was nice to just sit & work in a different environment.
4. Bingo night with the wild & crazy kids that I tutor. They were so wound up, but I love em!
5. Finding the courage to talk to strangers just to offer encouraging words or to strike up conversation with people I run into who I think won't remember me. It's fun making connections.
6. Watching funny squirrel videos, even though I missed Squirrel Appreciation Day.
7. Getting my Notary Public card in the mail - it's official!
8. Making homemade sweet potato fries and lasagna and making a huge mess of the kitchen.
9. Trying out my new glasses.
10. Finding time to relax.
Highlights:
1. Dinner with my roommates - so grateful for them! Thai food so spicy it burned my throat...but so yummy!
2. Small group with just the girls - and the babies. Love getting to cuddle those little ones.
3. Coffee shop hopping after an afternoon dentist appointment. Had to leave the first place after my internet time ran out. Was nice to just sit & work in a different environment.
4. Bingo night with the wild & crazy kids that I tutor. They were so wound up, but I love em!
5. Finding the courage to talk to strangers just to offer encouraging words or to strike up conversation with people I run into who I think won't remember me. It's fun making connections.
6. Watching funny squirrel videos, even though I missed Squirrel Appreciation Day.
7. Getting my Notary Public card in the mail - it's official!
8. Making homemade sweet potato fries and lasagna and making a huge mess of the kitchen.
9. Trying out my new glasses.
10. Finding time to relax.
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Expectation
I just listened to a podcast about a man who is blind but uses a clicking noise with his mouth to sense what's around him - like echolocation. He does this so well that he can do most things on his own without a problem, including things like riding a bike.
He didn't even realize this was unusual until he was in around 5th grade and met another blind student who could not get around by himself. Someone led him everywhere, brought him his lunch, etc. He was basically afraid to be alone. And this shocked the first guy, who couldn't understand it.
The difference, the podcast postulated, was the expectations put on each boy by those around them. The first boy had parents who let him climb trees, explore the world around him, and allowed him to learn from his mistakes, even if it could be dangerous at times. He lived as "normally" as possible. The second boy had parents who tried to help him by catering to him, not expecting him to be able to do things like everyone else.
As an adult, the first man had testing done on his brain that showed the visual cortex reacting in the same way as a person who can see. Essentially, he said he could "see" images in his head when he clicked. (This was not true in other blind people who did not use clicking.)
Anyway, long story short, the conclusion was that our expectations have the power to make a blind person see. Pretty amazing stuff!
Apply that to other situations, and think of the power we have to influence those around us for the good.
What do you expect of your friends, your family, your co-workers? What about yourself? Are you setting the bar too low?
What crazy, unexpected things could we accomplish if we just expected more?
He didn't even realize this was unusual until he was in around 5th grade and met another blind student who could not get around by himself. Someone led him everywhere, brought him his lunch, etc. He was basically afraid to be alone. And this shocked the first guy, who couldn't understand it.
The difference, the podcast postulated, was the expectations put on each boy by those around them. The first boy had parents who let him climb trees, explore the world around him, and allowed him to learn from his mistakes, even if it could be dangerous at times. He lived as "normally" as possible. The second boy had parents who tried to help him by catering to him, not expecting him to be able to do things like everyone else.
As an adult, the first man had testing done on his brain that showed the visual cortex reacting in the same way as a person who can see. Essentially, he said he could "see" images in his head when he clicked. (This was not true in other blind people who did not use clicking.)
Anyway, long story short, the conclusion was that our expectations have the power to make a blind person see. Pretty amazing stuff!
Apply that to other situations, and think of the power we have to influence those around us for the good.
What do you expect of your friends, your family, your co-workers? What about yourself? Are you setting the bar too low?
What crazy, unexpected things could we accomplish if we just expected more?
Wednesday, January 21, 2015
New Look
Well, it's getting late, but I didn't want to break my blogging streak, so this will be short & sweet.
After probably 10 years, I finally got some new glasses. I don't wear glasses very often since I usually wear contacts, but my old pair was getting a little worn, so I decided it was time for something new. I got talked into two pairs - the professional one & the fun one. Of course, I loved them both at the store, but now that they're home, I'm not as sure. They'll grow on me, though.
I don't have a picture of the professional ones yet, but here are the fun ones:
After probably 10 years, I finally got some new glasses. I don't wear glasses very often since I usually wear contacts, but my old pair was getting a little worn, so I decided it was time for something new. I got talked into two pairs - the professional one & the fun one. Of course, I loved them both at the store, but now that they're home, I'm not as sure. They'll grow on me, though.
I don't have a picture of the professional ones yet, but here are the fun ones:
Now, I think it's time for a hair cut!
If you give a mouse a cookie....
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
21 Days to New Habits?
Some say it takes 21 days to form a new habit.
Upon further research, apparently that's a myth. (On a side note, if you don't know the "apparently kid" you should check this out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz5TGN7eUcM You're welcome.)
One article I read said realistically, it takes 2-8 months to build new behaviors into your life.
In any case, I've been working on some new habits, and I'm about to hit the 21 day mark, so I'll call it a small victory. :)
I'm not one for New Year's resolutions, but I did decide to start some new things on January 1st, and so far they've been successful.
1. Gratitude Jar
2. Q&A a Day Journal
I saw this journal on someone else's blog and thought it was such a cool idea. There's a question for each day of the year with lines for 5 different years. I can't wait to see how my answers compare next year.
(Don't worry, I think today's answer is "no")
3. My Utmost for His Highest
I'm pretty sure this book has been in my house at least since I was in high school. I've read it in bits and pieces over the years, but I always get something new out of it. I've been reading it daily since the beginning of the month, and even though I don't always understand all of Mr. Chambers' fancy language, it always challenges me. If you've never read it, I highly recommend it...and I think they have versions in more modern language now as well.
I guess if I had to give this month a theme, I would say "Reflection." I hope to keep these habits going even as the busy season approaches at work.
Only 1-7 months to go to form the habit!
Upon further research, apparently that's a myth. (On a side note, if you don't know the "apparently kid" you should check this out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz5TGN7eUcM You're welcome.)
One article I read said realistically, it takes 2-8 months to build new behaviors into your life.
In any case, I've been working on some new habits, and I'm about to hit the 21 day mark, so I'll call it a small victory. :)
I'm not one for New Year's resolutions, but I did decide to start some new things on January 1st, and so far they've been successful.
1. Gratitude Jar
Every day I take a little slip of paper and write down something I'm thankful for, something good that happened that day, or something I might want to remember. The goal is to be able to look back at the end of the year & see all the things I have to be grateful for. So far it's been a great way to reflect on the day and it's fun to watch the jar fill up! (Another random side: This jar used to be my fish bowl :) )
2. Q&A a Day Journal
(Don't worry, I think today's answer is "no")
3. My Utmost for His Highest
I'm pretty sure this book has been in my house at least since I was in high school. I've read it in bits and pieces over the years, but I always get something new out of it. I've been reading it daily since the beginning of the month, and even though I don't always understand all of Mr. Chambers' fancy language, it always challenges me. If you've never read it, I highly recommend it...and I think they have versions in more modern language now as well.
I guess if I had to give this month a theme, I would say "Reflection." I hope to keep these habits going even as the busy season approaches at work.
Only 1-7 months to go to form the habit!
Monday, January 19, 2015
Things I've Learned After 3 Weeks Off of Facebook
- I don't need to know as much as I thought I did
- I have more free time in my day than I realized (and I can still find frivolous ways to fill that time, even without FB)
- Instead of feeling more lonely, I feel less so
- I can survive without seeing every photo of all of my friends' children or what everyone ate for dinner
- I can still relate to people without saying, "Hey, did you see _____ (fill in the blank) on Facebook?"
And...
- Apparently Facebook misses me more than I miss it because it keeps sending me random notification emails about things it never notified me about before!
- Thanks for making me feel loved, FB
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